One month later...

It's been a month since Asher was born, and everything is going very well for all of us. Paul and I have had our ups and downs, but what couple doesn't during the first few weeks after bringing home a new baby? We are all getting much more rest now, and that has made a huge difference.


Asher was a sleeping machine the first week or so, but we hit a few speed bumps. He is a very gassy little guy, but we seem to have that under control now. Emma had a super nasty cold (it's actually STILL lingering), and Asher caught a touch of it. Mostly he just has a stuffy nose. He was sleeping very well in bed with us, but we were unable to keep him propped up enough once he got stuffy. He hated the bassinet, the vibrating lamb chair and both of his swings. Luckily, we found a bouncy chair on clearance at Target, and that did the trick. Some eucalyptus and rosemary oil in his humidifier and a whole lot of nose suctioning also helped! He is still stuffy, but he's back on track with sleep 3-4 hours at a stretch at night. Hooray!

Asher smiled for the first time today! What a way to celebrate his one month milestone. I didn't know if it was just a silly face or not, but he smiled again when I spoke to him in a silly voice. And he was looking right at me when he did it. He smiled several more times before I got the sense to try to take a picture. This one is the best I could get.


We have about an hour every night when Asher hates the world. It breaks our hearts, because he is such a happy baby otherwise. But from about 8pm-9pm, Asher is angry. It's not the full on meltdowns Emma had at his age (and still has, as a matter of fact... haha). He cries out a little and grunts a whole lot, but you can tell he is not happy. He will every once in a while cry his little heart out, but we think that was mostly due to his gurgley tummy. We just know to anticipate this, and a little snuggle goes a long way with him. He wants to suck all the time, but the silly guy just will not take a pacifier. His hands only make him mad, and... well... I have other things that need to be done, if you catch my drift. He'll figure it all out eventually, though. Actually, he gets better and better every day.

Emma is still her wonderful monstrous self! Her top two year molars are the only teeth she has left to cut, and we will all be so much happier once they finally come through. She has been miserable, and a miserable Emma takes everyone else down with her. The one plus to a cranky little lady is it makes her extra snuggly. However, we aren't always able to pick her up or have her on our laps, and that is NOT okay with her. The one person who can brighten her day no matter what, is Asher. She loves that little guy like nothing and no one else. When she goes to bed, she gives him the longest kiss and the biggest hug. She always tells him she loves him, and she hates when she can't see him. When we pick her up from school, the first thing she does is look for him and asks, "where Asher?" For as angry as Emma can get, she can be 5 times sweeter. She brings me water whenever I am feeding Asher. If I am holding Asher, she will sit there and just watch him or lay her head on him. If he starts fussing, she will drop everything to make sure we are taking care of him. The best thing we ever did for our little girl was give her a little brother to love so much.


I got a new car stereo for Christmas, but we don't use it for anything more than listening to Emma CDs. I am thankful to have a working CD player, though, or else I would have to do all the singing. Emma knows how to ask for her favorite songs now, and it's hard not to play or sing them for her when she asks so sweetly. It is amazing to hear her sing along with the songs. She may only get a few of the words right, but it's still evidence that my Pumpkin Pie is growing up. She also likes to help me in the kitchen and take showers with me now. Both of which are fun most of the time, but a bit of a hassle at other times. Since figuring out how to get to the kitchen counter, Emma has decided that is the ONLY place she will eat dinner. Fine with me. But while she's up there, she smears food in all the drawers. Oh well. Shower time is no longer my private quiet time. If Emma hears the shower, she makes a beeline to join me. She also asks for showers all day and all evening long... I have to have Paul distract her in the mornings from time to time, so I can take a nice super hot, super short shower by myself. But I wouldn't have it any other way. I love watching her point out her body parts and draw pictures with her bath crayons. I draw shapes for her, and she identifies more and more of them every week. She is such a smart little girl, and it amazes me every day.

An old game has come back as one of Emma's new favorites. That girl LOVES to play peek-a-boo. She'll hide behind something or put something in front of her face and say "where Emma?" When we ask where she is, she'll show herself and say "peek-a-boo!" She also likes asking where her daddy is. Even is he's standing in front of her, Emma will ask "Daddy? Where you?" When he says where he is, Emma giggles and thinks it's just the best thing ever.

Emma is more and more grown up every day. It's amazing and heartbreaking at the same time to see how quickly it happens. It's equally amazing and heartbreaking to see how quickly Asher is developing and growing bigger and bigger every day. I couldn't ask for more than my perfectly little family.

The story behind the name

Emma's name is pretty straight forward. Emma Noel. Paul picked Emma, and I picked Noel. Anyone who knows me knows I love Christmas time, so Noel was a pretty obvious choice. Now Asher Huckleberry... that's another story.

Since before Emma was born, Paul has begged me to agree to Huckleberry Sawyer as our first son's name. Paul very obviously loved the story of Huckleberry Finn. I vetoed the suggestion. Poor Paul. My biggest concern is that our son would never be taken seriously with Huckleberry for a first name. We compromised and agreed Huckleberry made a good middle name. The Paul could have his "Huck", and I could have a son with a more serious first name.

We never could figure out a name we both loved, and luckily we had a little girl. This time around, I brought up the name Asher Huckleberry. Asher was a name I LOVED while pregnant with Emma, and I still liked the name. Paul wasn't sold. We toyed around with some other names. Tristan Huckleberry, Finn Alexander, Isaac Mikhail... none of them felt right. I kept my heart secretly set on Asher, and Paul still wanted Huckleberry to be a part of the name. When Emma says "hug", it comes out "huck". She came running up to me one night, yelled "huck!", patted my belly and hugged it. Paul and I just kind of grinned. Paul said, "she just called the baby Huck". I replied, "no. She said hug." But the memory stuck. Around week 36, Paul sent me a text. "Asher Huckleberry". I was afraid he'd change his mind, so I told him we would talk about it later. In the end, we both agreed it just felt right.

The meaning of Asher is fortunate, blessing and happy. He is living up to that name perfectly. We are fortunate to have him, he has been a true blessing to all who know him and he is such a happy baby who has made us all happy in return. I have no doubt that his middle name will show up in his personality as he gets older. I can already see the adventures he will have and the trouble he will get into. He's a little boy with a wild big sister. Adventure and trouble are inevitable, and I think it will be perfect!

Our Family of Four

Adjusting to being a family of four has been easier than I ever thought possible. Emma is in love with her little brother. She just stares at him and says, "baby! Wow!" She wants to hug and kiss him all the time. We try to make sure she doesn't touch his hands or face, though, because she has a cold. Emma has been her normal terror self, but she is not acting out from jealousy. She is just being Emma. But as terrible as she can be, Emma is still my sweet pumpkin pie. She is dancing and singing songs now. She is speaking in sentences, and one of those sentences is "I love you".


Christmas was a blast, but boy oh boy does it last forever when you have a hungry newborn and busy body toddler. We had to open some of Emma's presents for her, because she lost interest. Emma loves all of her new toys. She has a kitchen with a bake set, a tent with a tunnel entrance, a frog night light that plays music and projects stars, a shopping cart, some puzzles and a few other toys. Emma has been "cooking" in her kitchen since we put it together, and she already has a stash of toys in her tent. Every night she sleeps with her frog. She just stares at the stars until she passes out.



Asher either slept or ate through the opening of all his presents. He got several outfits, some toys and a couple of pacifiers. Daddy also got him some hooded towels.


Paul and I both loved all of our gifts. Later in the day, I had a melt down, but Paul let me cry and made me feel better. I was feeling guilty about Asher not having enough amniotic fluid when he was still in my belly. I felt like a failure for being able to tolerate labor without an epidural. Asher's bandages from his circumcision stuck, and he bled and screamed when I pulled them off. I trimmed his nails and cut one of his fingers. I felt like I was neglecting Emma. I was sad about not being able to pick Emma up. Oh I could go on forever about all the things I was feeling guilty over and sad about. On top of that, I was missing my belly and feeling Asher in I was getting cabin fever. We went for a nice long car ride, and the fresh air did us all some good.

Today Asher had his first well baby check, and it went very well. He has gained two ounces, and he is still perfect. Asher eats a lot throughout the day, and he sleeps for about 3-4 hours at a time at night. He rarely cries and mostly just grumbles when he's unhappy. He didn't even cry when he had his heel pricked. Asher doesn't have to go back for his two week check up, as he's already reached the milestones they check for at that appointment. The next well baby check will be when Asher is two months old.


Emma discovered her shadow last night, and it terrified her. She ran all around the kitchen trying to get away from it, and finally ran to Paul to have him pick her up. I showed her how shadows can wave, and she figured out they also give great high fives and fist bumps. After that, Emma decided shadows weren't so bad.

Asher had his first bath since we've been home. He hated it, so I didn't take any pictures. Emma watched him the whole time, and was very concerned for him. After Emma and Asher both got dressed for bed, we went into Emma's room for story time with Daddy. Emma gave us all hugs and kisses, but she gave Asher more love than anyone else.


I really feel that Asher completes our family at this point. I would still love to have more children in the future, but I am very happy with things as they are right now. I was so worried I wouldn't be able to give Emma the attention she is used to. It turns out I was right, but Emma doesn't care. All three of us devote time to Asher that was previously given to some one else. She doesn't get as much attention as she did before, but Emma is perfectly fine with that.


I am sure this is mostly just a long ramble of a post. I am tired and trying to remember everything I've been meaning to share. In just a few hours, Asher will be one week old. I'm not sure how that happened so fast. Time flies by, so I'll go for now. I need to nuzzle Emma once more before I go cuddle and feed Asher. Then I'll crawl into bed with my sweet husband and thank him for giving me such a wonderful life.

Asher's Arrival

At 37 weeks, I was diagnosed with high blood pressure and put on bed rest. I took the time to relax and get caught up on some Netflix. The night of the 15th, I started having contractions every 7 minutes starting around 10:30pm. By 3AM, I was pretty sure we would be having a baby that day. Unfortunately, my contractions stopped around 5AM. At my appointment that day, my doctor checked me, and I had made no real progress. I was still 1.5 cm / 80%, which is what I was measuring at 37 weeks. I was devastated. I really thought I had made at least a little progress after all the contractions. So I went home and continued my bed rest.



On December 20th, I realized I hadn't felt Baby move very much. This was very out of the ordinary. The night before, he had been moving like crazy. I drank cold water, ate some sweets and pushed on his little bottom, and I got barely anything in response from Baby. I called my doctor's office, and they said some one would call me back shortly. After an hour, no one had called me back. Paul and I were getting antsy. We decided to head into town and go to Labor and Delivery to be monitored. While on the monitors, we noticed there was a sudden drop in Baby's heart rate. I had also been having contractions all day, and they were showing up on the monitors every 5 minutes or so. Because of Baby's heart rate dip, my doctor decided to have a biophysical profile ultrasound done. Baby would not practice breathing or use fine motor skills and there was almost no amniotic fluid left. Needless to say, we failed the test.


Paul had to go and pick Emma up from school at this time, and my friend Kelly came to keep me company while we waited to hear back from the doctor. After a short wait, my nurse told me everything looked fine except for the amniotic fluid. It was no longer beneficial for Baby to remain inside, so my doctor had decided to induce me. Not later that night. Not tomorrow. Right then. I called Mom to tell her to pack her bags and get ready to meet her new grand baby. And I called Paul to tell him we would be a family of four sometime in the next 24 hours. I was taken to my room to begin the induction process. Kelly was company for the next hour or so.

We started out with a dose of prostaglandin gel at 6:00pm. I was to lie flat for an hour. Then I would be able to walk for an hour to help me progress, and they would give me another dose of the gel afterward. At 6:30, my water broke on its own. When my water broke, Baby stopped moving again. Walking around was out of the question. I had to drink a bunch of juice, but that didn't help. the nurse decided some IV fluids may be the answer, and that perked Baby right up. I was allowed to walk around for a little while. My contractions were coming faster and harder. Kelly had gone home, and Paul was waiting for Mom to come and watch Emma at the house. I was losing confidence in myself. I cried as I wandered the halls of the hospital. I knew I wasn't going to be able to have the natural birth I hoped for. At 9:15PM, I made my way back to my room just as Paul got to the hospital. I cried even harder when I saw him. The nurse found me and said she wanted to check my progress. She also offered to give me something to help me relax. I had gotten way too worked up to relax on my own. We all could see that. When she checked me, I had progressed to 4cm / 100%. The nurse gave me stadol take the edge off, and I was able to relax for a few hours. Paul took the opportunity to nap. Around 12AM it wore off, and I was sent to walk the halls again. My contractions were unbearable and right on top of each other again. I couldn't go more than a few steps between contractions, and I was nauseous and shaking. I finally broke down and got an epidural, and I was so glad I did! It was 1:00AM, and I was 5cm and in active labor. The nurse figured I might have a little while still, so I tried to nap but couldn't. Paul had no problem in that department. I missed Emma so much. I dozed for a few minuted and dreamed I was snuggling her.

At around 2AM, my nurse came in to check me, and I was 8cm. She said not to get my hopes up, because I still had some dropping to do and progress to make. I knew better. Once I hit active labor with Emma, I was ready to push in a few hours. At 3AM, I called my nurse to say I felt pressure. She checked me, and I was complete. The nurse called for the doctor. I started pushing at 3:40AM, and my little guy was born at 4:05AM. Asher Huckleberry Hancock was born perfect and healthy. He was the best Christmas present we could have asked for.

Thanksgiving

This was our last trip out of town for a very, very long time! I really don't see us traveling with a newborn, toddler, three dogs and all of the required stuff to keep us all happy any time in the near future. We went down to Phoenix for the weekend, and we all had a good time. We spent Thanksgiving with Mom, Sam and Larry. We went ahead and gave them their gifts, since we didn't know what Christmas would hold for us. We decided to get Mom and Dad, Sam and Larry and Paul and Me matching logo shirts and a new board game. Something fun and silly, and everyone seemed happy. We stayed up a little too late playing the game, but isn't that what new games are for?

Emma was a little bit of a monster over Thanksgiving, but she really wasn't napping or sleeping well the entire weekend. So it was expected. We all made way too much food, but it was delicious. Unfortunately for Emma, she didn't taste a bite. All she wanted was Goldfish and pink lemonade. Given that none of the adults were eating very healthy, Paul and I just let her have what she wanted.

Mom, Sam and I decided to forgo the tradition of waking up hours before the sun to hit all the Black Friday Sales, but Mom, Paul and I still got up when Emma did to get a somewhat early start to our shopping. I was able to get all of Paul's gifts, and we only have one more thing left to get for Emma. My little Pumpkin Pie did very well shopping all day, and she even stayed up extra late to go out to dinner with all of us. Emma had her first Oreo and surprised up by promptly opening it and eating all the cream. I guess somethings are just instinct!

Over Thanksgiving weekend, we discovered Emma knows Pat-A-Cake. Since then, we have also learned Emma knows some of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, Row Row Row your boat and The Itsy Bitsy Spider. She may not know too many of the words, but she knows enough of the words and melody to make it obvious what she's singing! Emma is also starting to speak in sentences and can say the names of many of her friends at school, family members and animals. The only name she can't quite grasp yet is Biko... whom she calls Guppo... which we all think is even cuter. Dancing has become a favorite past time for Emma. She particularly loves swing music, but if she has her tutu on, she will dance to anything! Emma's favorite animals right now are dogs and elephants. If she sees either one, she will shout out "dog" or "elphan".

Potty training was going very well, but Emma decided to take a week off. Paul and I were to blame as well, since during that time we kept forgetting to ask if she needed to go. In the past few days, Emma has gotten better again. She is waking up with dry diapers and is letting me know she needs to go potty instead of just drinking her milk and going in her diaper. This coming weekend will be a "panty weekend", so hopefully that will help encourage her to go on the potty.

Paul and I are doing well. I was being a horrible person for several weeks, but I finally opened up to Paul about how overwhelmed, tired and sore I have been. I was afraid to break down, because he would think I was weak and unfit as a mother. I have no idea why I would think such a thing of my sweet husband, but I did. The day I finally let it all out, Paul bought us a new mattress topper and me a new body pillow. I can finally sleep for longer than an hour at a time, and it's amazing what a little sleep can do to heal the soul! My bones are still horribly sore, but at least they don't hurt while I am in bed. I am not so terrified of not being able to handle Emma and a new baby, and I am back to eagerly anticipating the joys and challenges being a mother of two will bring. I apologized profusely to poor Paul for how awful I had been, and he has once again forgiven me for being nasty.

We are now as close to being ready for Baby as a family can possibly be. The nursery is ready, and the bassinet is set up in our room. We have enough essentials to get us started, but I am planning a mini shopping spree when Baby is born so I can buy some gender specific clothes, spit cloths, etc. Emma has a very limited notion of what is going on, but I think she will be very excited to have a baby in the house. She loves to visit the babies at school, and she is always very gentle with them. If anything, I think she may be angry with me for dividing my time, but I really don't think she will be mean to Baby. Emma is in love with my belly, which she calls "baby", and she loves to rub lotion on it and give it kisses. Though my little lady can be a monster, she can also be one of the sweetest little girls I have ever known. Even Emma's teachers comment on how lovable she can be. I truly think giving her a baby brother or sister will be one of the best things we have ever done for her and our family. After all, how can a child ever be anything other than a blessing?

Halloween

This year Emma dressed up as Little Bo Peep. We went to Boo at the Zoo the weekend before Halloween with my mom, dad, Sam and Larry. Emma had a blast. She loved the birds and the farm area. She especially loved the cows and goats.


Emma could have stayed in the farm all day. In fact, she burst into tears when I took her away from the cows. By that time, she was pretty exhausted, so Paul carried her for a little while before putting her back into her stroller. Emma had a blast with her Grammy and Papa. She ran all over the zoo, and Papa did a great job of chasing after her. It was great to see her having such a good time. Dad will be leaving to go back to Saudi soon, and it almost seemed like Emma knew that. She snuggled with him, played with him and was an all around charmer.



On Halloween, Paul, Emma and I went into Flagstaff to trick-or-treat downtown. It didn't take Emma long to get the hang of it. At the first couple of stops, we had to pick out the candy for Emma. After that, she would look at me, run over to whoever had the candy, grab a piece and run away. She had to stop constantly to make sure her candy was still in her basket, even though I kept telling her I wouldn't steal it.

For dinner, we stopped at a pizza place. I noticed Emma still had a dry diaper, so I took her to the bathroom to see if she would go. Sure enough, as soon as I sat her down, she went pee pee. It was her first time going potty in a public place. She is getting so good at knowing when she has to go potty, that I've convinced her teachers to help out with potty training, even though they don't usually start working with the kiddos until they are in the 2 year old room. Anyway, we all had a great time last night. It was an awesome way to spend Halloween.

Some other updates:


Emma is talking up a storm now. She knows exactly what she's trying to say, and we can actually decipher most of it. She is sleeping in her big girl bed now, and she uses the potty more often than not when she's at home. She's even waking up to go potty. Emma has become so self-sufficient it's often heartbreaking at endearing at the same time. The other day, she said, "I yuh you" and gave me a big hug. That was the first time she told me she loves me without being prompted, and I LOVED it. She gives hugs and kisses and says she loves us all the time. We are very excited to see how she is with her new baby brother or sister.

Gambel made it to 16 weeks and even had some of his adult teeth in now. It seems he had a brush with death and made it through unscathed. He is getting very big, and we all (Alpine and Trixie included) absolutely adore him. Emma loves to feed him, and he is pretty much housebroken already.

Baby is doing very well. We had an ultrasound last week. Baby is breech, but that's not really a huge concern yet. Emma was breech, too, until 36 weeks. So there's still plenty of time. Right now, Baby is estimated to weigh about 4 lbs, so we are pretty sure this one will be chubbier than Emma was. I still have no idea whether we were having a boy or girl, but Paul says boy. I think I'll stick with girl so at least one of us will be right. We have a diaper party next weekend, a date to see Harry Potter and a hospital tour the weekend after and after that... it'll be Thanksgiving. Time is going by so quickly, and I don't think it will slow down any time soon. Ready or not, here come the holidays and a new baby!

The missing months

September and October just flew by. As is customary of life, things have been crazy around here. After my doctor decided to move and close his practice, I found another. I was apprehensive at first, as I had a previous bad experience with him, but he is turning out to be okay. While Paul was working on a fire sometime in September, I ended up with a nasty fever. I had to suck it up to take care of Emma, but it wiped me out. It broke on its own in the middle of the night, but I still felt cruddy for a while. I also caught a cold with a cough that would not go away. Unfortunately, Emma and Paul were also sick. Emma had the cold first, and was feeling fine in just a few days. It took me about a week, and Paul was sick for several weeks.

By October we were all feeling fine, but we had a surprise in store. On October 6, our neighborhood was hit by a tornado. Our part of Arizona was hit with 8 tornadoes in 24 hours. It had been storming all night, so I didn't sleep well at all. I seemed to be the only having a hard time relaxing. At 5 that morning, the storm seemed to suddenly pick up, and I told Paul I was sick of it. The wind got louder and the house started shaking. I could hear cracking noises, and I was terrified. I jumped out of bed and ran to Emma's room to check on her. She was still sleeping and things seemed to be calming down outside. I stood outside of her room trying to figure out what I should do, and Paul convinced me to go back to bed. We realized the electricity had gone out, so Paul went to find some candles so we could get up and get ready for the day. I was still really nervous from the storm and kept telling Paul that something really terrible had happened. We started noticing the sound of sirens and shouting outside. Paul saw that one of our windows had cracked. I called my mom to tell her something was going on but I wasn't sure what. I said they would hear about Bellemont on the news, and I wanted to let her and my dad know that we were alright. I said I would call when I knew more.

By then, the sun started coming up, and I saw that the back fences had blown over. I was trying to figure out a way to warm some milk up for Emma (she still likes warm milk in the mornings and before bed), but the pilot on the stove wouldn't light. Paul had gotten Emma out of bed, and I went upstairs to get her. We noticed people kept shining lights in our windows, so we knew something serious was going on. I was standing at the top of the stairs with Emma when our back door opened. A man with a flashlight came in and said he was with the sheriff's department. He wanted to make sure we were alright. I said we were fine, and another man walked in behind the officer. I asked what was going on, and the officer said there had been a tornado. The other man was a neighbor, and he said we were very lucky. He was from three houses over, and their house had been completely destroyed. I would later find out that this neighbor, after assuring his family was safe, had gone down the street and turned off every one's gas lines. This would prove to be a blessing. There ended up being four gas leaks in our house, and I am terrified to think of what could have happened while I was trying to relight the stove if the gas had still been on.

At around 6am, Paul and I started wandering around outside to see what damage had been done. Besides a few cracked windows a destroyed garage door and a collapsed fence, we seemed to have thankfully gotten by with a minimal amount of damage. Our neighbors were not so lucky. The house next to ours had lost all of their windows and garage doors, the house next to theirs had lost their roof, and the third house over was almost completely gone. While I was talking to one of neighbors, we saw another tornado touching down. I had Emma, I grabbed the dogs and Paul, and we all hid in the downstairs closet. I decided we had gotten lucky once, and I was not going to tempt fate again. My boss and friend, Cheri, had already booked a room for us in Flagstaff, and I told Paul we needed to get out of the house as soon as it was safe enough to leave the house.

We ended up staying in a hotel for a week while we were waiting for the gas and electricity to be repaired. In the mean time, Paul stayed home from work to get our fenced repaired so the dogs could leave the garage. My mom, aunt, cousin and grandmother came up for a day to help Paul finish the fence and clean up the glass and debris outside. They were a great help, which was much appreciated. The following week, I had to go out of town for work. So back into a hotel I went. The week after I got back, Paul had to go out of town for work.

Our sweet little Emma had a rough time while we were in the hotel, but she felt much better once we able to go back home. By Halloween, Emma was back to her peppy self, but that's another post. I'm pretty sure this one has gotten long enough.